I Dream of Jeannie

What would you do if you had your own genie? Well this sitcom shows you what not to do if you ever have one. That is, don’t be a Major Nelson!


Major Nelson was a complete and utter pillock. Jeannie herself was an airhead, but she was pretty darn hot so that made up for her stupidity, but what was Nelson’s excuse? Here he has this gorgeous genie who’s just itching to grant him wishes and he doesn’t want anything granted. He’d rather continue on with his life as usual and never gain any benefits from his genie. Never achieve his wildest dreams or have everything he wants unless it’s done the normal way… without magic.


Nobody in their right mind would be like Major Nelson if they had their own genie. Talk about an unrealistic show! If you’ve got a genie, you’re gonna make use of her in any way you possibly can. You’re gonna take advantage of those unlimited wishes. How about some realism here? Geeze Wayne!


Alright, alright, I know Jeannie screws everything up. She always does. No matter what she does to try to help Major Nelson something always goes wrong. She’s incompetent, right? so it’s no wonder Nelson won’t let her use her magic.


But wait! All that chump has to do is supervise her! Take her by the hand and instruct her on everything she has to do, one thing at a time. Make sure that she does it exactly the way he wants it done. Surely that would have worked?


Half the bloody reason she gets carried away is because she’s being caged in. Not able to be herself. So what do you expect from her? It’s like a kid who’s got so many rules, that sometimes they just blow a fuse and they do stupid things. All Jeannie needs is a little more freedom to be able to exercise her powers once and a while, that’s all. Just make sure that you, Major Nelson are supervising this and what can go wrong?


But no, you’re a complete mug.


You don’t deserve your own genie, because you don’t make any constructive use out of her. Imagine all the good you could do if you just used her. You could end starvation, homelessness and crime. You could bring about world peace. Even make Donald Trump into presidential material, But no, you don’t. 


You’re an ASS Major Nelson. An ASS!



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